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loves to you all. muah!

happiness.

today was such a good day.

i'm going to bed with a smile on my face.

goodnight good day, let's try for another one tomorrow.

anyone know where i can get some motivation??

this is me on a thursday night avoiding getting anything done.
our stuff is about 50% unpacked & as much as i want stuff put away i have no motivation to actually do it.

this week has been fun!
monday i hung out with jamie & corban. i also visited 2 targets, which always makes me happy. i bought benjamin a couple of pretty sweet shirts, too.

not only are they cute, but they were only $2 each. i love love love target clearance.

yesterday i went to joann's and bought the rest of the supplies i need to make the quilt for benjamin's bed. now i just have to get it started & done.

and then today i went to the doctors, which was cool because everything is going great, but not so cool cause i gained another 8 lbs this month. grrr. oh well, i'm determined to enjoy the rest of my pregnancy & not worry so much about the weight. she wants me to be completely ready for benjamin in the next 4 weeks just in case i go into labor early. only 4 weeks! craziness. i have A LOT to do. after the doctors we had breakfast at a's, which was totally awesome! i love chorizo & potato burittos. and then for lunch i had the pleasure of having lunch with jamie, corban, sherrie, & harvey at red robin. LOVE their hamburgers.

now i'm home & nate's at class & i'm just trying to get motivated. me & davy jones are a bit homesick for moorpark & can't wait to go up on friday!!

move it.

i have some packing to do & i'm completely unmotivated to do so.
i'm so sick of moving.
i just want to be in one place & have my own home again with my own decorations & my own stuff.
*sigh*

there's my bitching for the night.

iowa.

My best friend is officially "home" in Iowa. 

My home just doesn't feel the same without her. 

I'm still in a slight state of denial. 

excited.

wednesday we're going to do a 4D ultrasound & i cannot begin to tell you how excited i am to see benjamin in all his 4D glory. i keep trying to figure out what he looks like...it'll be so amazing to see who's nose he has, what his little hands look like, if he's really as big as i think he is & what position he's in. i have yet to figure out what body part of his is constantly kicking me and causing me problems breathing. 

so stoked! can't wait to share our videos & pictures. 

i'm really...

into this cd right now. 

fabric.fabric.

today we went to l.a. to michael levine, one of my favorite fabric stores, to try to find fabric to complete benjamin's bedding. we're already set on using the retro rocket rascals fabric by michael miller & needed something simple to complete it. after much looking around we settled on a red & white poke-a-dot & a white chenile to go with the two. now the plan is that i'm going to sew a quilt using the retro rocket rascals & poke-a-dots on the front & the chenile will be the backing. i'm going to trim the blanket with satin ribbon. i'm also going to make a bed skirt using just the red poke-a-dots and then a bumper using the retro rocket rascals fabric.
i'm pretending not to be overwhelmed. haha. i've never taken anything this big on as a sewing project so i'm just praying that it all works out. luckily i know some awesome sewers so if worse comes to worse i can ask for help. i'm also supposedly crocheting him a blanket, but that'll have to wait a bit. not like i didn't know he was coming over the past 6.5 months. ha.

yesterday.

found my old nose ring.
went to target.
bought 2 new books; the shack & marley & me.
registered for more stuff at babies r us.
finished 2 beanies.
watched step up 2 the streets. most amazing dance sequence ever.
had some amazing hot chocolate. 


pretty much an amazing day.

2008

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?

In September we went on a 7 day cruise to Mexico. Amazingness. 

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I can't really remember any new ones that I made last year. I always start my year by trying to read a book a week & even though I read a lot, I definitely didn't fulfill that. This year I just want to focus more on my relationship with God & being a good wife & mother. I'm not even sure you could call that a resolution, though, because it'll be a work in progress for my whole life, I'm sure.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes, my cousin Valerie & friends Ashley, Jamie & Sherrie.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Yes, my Punkin Nina (Aunt Lillian) died in June. I still can't believe it sometimes. I wish she was here to meet Benjamin.

5. What countries did you visit?

Just Mexico. We walked across the border twice with Tyler & Sherrie & had some good tacos & $.99 beer. And we went on a 7 day cruise with the Mahoney's. 

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

The drive to complete my projects. I have so many things half finished. It irritates me. 

7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

January 4, 2008. It was the date I found out that I had miscarried. It changed my life drastically.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Not worrying as much. I've really come far in trusting God in our finances, where we live, and when he wants us to have children. things that used to really wear on me don't anymore. 

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not sure I had one. 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got deathly ill (maybe an exaggeration) in february with a fever of 104 for like 3 days & thought i was going to do. No real injuries, though, thankfully.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

My tattoos. I'm so happy I finally finished my back, it's so beautiful! Also, I love my tattoo on my right arm. It's in memory of my Grandma & I had been wanting to get it for so long. Now I only have to wait to get it colored.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, car payments, food, vacation, & tattoos. 

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Benjamin Patrick Boland. Finding out that I was pregnant was such a surprise. I had finally decided that I needed to just stop trying to control everything & it just happened. In the past 6 months I've come to completely adore my little boy even though I have yet to meet him.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Low feat. T-Pain by Flo Rida. I listened to a lot of Pop/Hip-Hop Radio this year. 

Compared to this time last year, are you:

17. Thinner or fatter?
Definitely fatter. 

18. Richer or poorer?

Definitely poorer.

19. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wish that I would have spent more time with my friends & family. Not that I didn't spend a lot of time with them, but I wish I would have done more with the opportunities given to me.

20. What do you wish you'd done less of?
I wish I would have spent less time feeling sorry for myself. It ruined so much of my year.

21. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent Christmas Eve at home with my parents, my brothers & other family. Christmas Day was spent driving to Mission Viejo to spend breakfast with Nate's family, then driving to Carson to hang out with all the Figueroa's, & then driving back to Mission Viejo to have dinner with the Perry's. 

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I fell more in love with Nate & so in love with Benjamin.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
America's Next Top Model, Project Runway, Grey's Anatomy, Heroes, Private Practice, Brothers & Sisters, Eli Stone, & 90210.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Nobody is worth that much of my time.

26. What was the best book you read?

I looked back over the books I read this year & Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer really stood out to me. It was so inspiring, I loved every part of it. And I'm not ashamed to say that I got hooked on the Twilight series. LOVE those books. 

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I grew to love Rihanna, Ray LaMontagne, Duffy, & Kanye West. Also, any new artist that FM 94.9 played. 

28. What did you want and get?

My tattoos.

29. What did you want and not get?

I'm sure there was plenty, but I can't really think of anything right now.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Dark Night & Step Up 2 The Streets. 

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I spent my 26th with my family. It was really low key. It was right after my Punkin Nina died, I was just starting my new job & moving from San Diego so that time is such a blur to me. 

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
My first reaction is to say that I wish I wouldn't have miscarried, our baby would be 6 months old about now. But then I think about it & I wouldn't be having Benjamin. God works everything for a reason.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Normal me, jeans & a t-shirt, horizontally striped shirts, but with some color. I tried to accessorize more...hats, scarves, jewlery. And I experimented with my hair a bit more. It was a fun year. 

34. What kept you sane?
More like "Who"...God. Nate. Hannah. My family. My close friends. I was in so much need this past year. I am so thankful for the people God has placed in my life. 

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Jonathon Rhys Meyers. <3

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Not sure which one to choose. I guess I'll just say that this year I was pretty stirred, more so than other years. I was a lot more informed than in past elections. 

37. Who did you miss?
San Diego.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Corban & Harvey.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
I'm not in control. 

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

So live your life, ay ay ay.

Instead of chasing that paper.

Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.

Ain't got no time for no haters.

Just live your life (Oh!) , ay ay ay.

No telling where it'll take you.

Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.